I Remember Standing on a Ledge

I remember standing on a ledge.

And all I could see below me was a thick bank of cloud.

Not the candy floss pillow kind,

The kind that are dark and ominous.

Full of condensed uncertainties.

Swarming and sloshing below me.

I remember standing on a ledge.

And having no memory of how I got there.

I just looked around at where I was.

And shivered.

The ledge was a metal slate.

But the structure that it was attached to was an empty stretch of concrete.

No window that I could have climbed through.

No door to let me back in.

I remember standing on a ledge

And hearing voices.

Shouting and snickering from every direction.

Filling my brain with their words.

Feeling them echoing around the inside of my skull.

The worst thing was,

That they were all voices that I knew.

Voices I loved.

Belonging to people I loved.

I remember standing on the edge.

When my ledge began to disappear.

Sucked by the inevitable,

Back into the wall.

Feeling my solid base of arguments and beliefs pulled out from beneath me.

Feeling my mask sliding away.

I don't remember the moment I fell off the ledge.

I was just suddenly falling.

Slowly at first.

Scared at first.

Then suddenly faster.

Then suddenly free.

I can't tell if I have hit the ground yet.